Pics of the Bike Expo Sept 2005

Bike Expo... like sex for your eyes.

You'd have to agree that this is with out doubt one of the most exciting photos taken in 2005. It's the car park directly outside Jeff's Shed.Note the intrinsic sense of action in this pic, the almost unbridled excitement. Nothing says "Action!" like a bunch of bikes parked next to each other. I needed a lie down and a calming ale after this one.






VTR1000 Concept Bike
I clearly hadn't recovered enough. As soon as I tried to take the pic I started listing to one side, then fell over completely. It was peaceful laying on the floor. Just for some journalistic endevour, you should know that this is Honda's VTR1000 concept bike. It's just jam packed with wonderful feature like radial mounted brake disks, some super-duper front end thingy that does away with forks, a purty single sided swingarm and other stuff I can't remember and don't really care to report. Needless to say it's very pretty and would look cool as hell on the road but don't hold your breath. It's really just an engineer's moment of wank. Shame, as it's a very nice wank, but a wank nonetheless.


Hyosung Aquilia 650
This is a new cruiser from Hyosung using the flexible 650 V-twin. All reports I've read have been positive to a point but it seems that the brakes have a way to go before they catch up to Japanese quality. Apparently Harley wasn't too impressed with the design, as it borrows heavily in looks from the V-Rod VRSC models. From the other side you can see some Yamaha Warrior influences in the shape of the enormous exhaust. Size wise it looks like a good option for larger people especially in LAMS mode.



Royal Enfield Cafe Racer
Royal Enfield would be the only mass produced motorcycle that still follows the designs and practices established 40 years ago. The parent business in England went broke years ago but the India based arm has been flourishing. They might still be making bikes from the 1950-60's but they're selling them to an appreciative market who like a bike that is robust and easy to fix by the side of the road with a hammer. This tasty morsel is the first cafe racer style from them I've seen and it looks quite trick. Unlike modern versions you can be sure that this would be as close to riding an original cafe racer as it gets, oil leaks and break downs included. Still, if I could afford to own one just for fun it would make it into my garage. That polished tank really looks cool and the seat actually looks comfortable.


BMW Fatzen Bastard Uber Tourer
If I had to spend more on a bike than I would on a house, this might be the bike for me. Big, plush, full of wizz-bangery as standard. It even has a bidet. Although you can't see it from this angle, each bike comes with a German power lifting midget who jumps out of one of the panniers to help hold the bike up when stationary. Whole families have been killed when one of these panzers fell off the side stand and they weren't even in the same town. This is a bike for real men, as long as your definition of a real man includes lofers, chardonnay and bree on limited edition water crackers.


Another German bike, Sachs Parts Bin Special
Pardon the shakey unfocused quality of this pic. I was so underwhelmed by this sorry example of German manufacturing that I just couldn't get it right. It was almost like the camera felt insulted to be capturing it's image and refused to focus or get the colours right. I think the engine comes from Suzuki or Yamaha. I really couldn't care less about this bike so I'm not even going to bother to check. It just screams "i'm so average and underdone it hurts, just look away". Why someone would go to all the trouble to build a piece of crap is beyond me but it's their money to blow I guess. This will not be gracing my garage anytime soon, or ever.

Sachs scooter thingy
I get the feeling that this was where Sachs' development dollars went for this year. I'd be more likely to have this in the garage than it's bigger brother. I can only assume that they aimed it at the young-groover-who-is-too-young-and-poor-to-buy-something-with-intrinsic-"cool" market, hence the projector beam head lights, funky rear mono shock and urban scooter warrior look. For a scooter it doesn't suck, that's high praise coming from me.



One is an Indian, one is not. Parts are hard to find.
They're really old, that's all I know. Actually, I know one other thing, whoever made them is now dead, they're that old. Note the lack of rear suspension. These babies were the prefered ride of eunuchs the world over. It should come as no suprise that owners of these bikes invariably had small families. Wives wishing to prevent further bundles of joy approved of these machines even if their men folk did not. It's no wonder that riding took a while to take off when you look at these two examples of self-harming heaven.



Who is that masked spunk?
That's all the women (and possibly a few men, we are an understanding society down south you know) were asking themselves as your truely took a Buell for a test ride. I'm the dashing gentleman in the middle of the shot in the fetching orange saftey vest. Simply wearing said vest increased my crash protection by 10,000%. I'll be buying one soon. I also hear there is a "bedroom" version that prevents pregnancy and STDs. I suspect it is because the partner you are trying to make sweet love to is laughing too hard at you to get romantic.




Well sports fans, that's it for the moment. I might post up a few more later once my PC gets back to broadband speed. Trying to load anything on dial up speed is just annoying and crashes alot. Hope you like the shots, or you've just wasted five minutes of your life and there is no refund.

Catch you later...

Aftermath of the Track Day and Bike Expo

What a great weekend! Seriously, that's how you spend a weekend properly! I went around to "Sunshine Boy" Mark's place on the Friday evening to leave the love of my life in his care (the bike, not Mel, she came home with me) to trailer it down for me he following morning. That all went smoothly and now I really want a bike trailer. After seeing Brendon's fully enclosed Super Trailer with carpet, lighting and other goodies I knew I just had to have one. My bike deserves no less than the best, damn it!

I knew everything went too bloody well, I woke to a really crap Saturday. Rain? Since when was that in the script? Bugger, bugger, bugger! Well a little water isn't going to stop me! Mel and I made amazingly good time getting ready given it was 6am on a Saturday, though I did manage to forget a couple of things, namely my water proof jacket and ear plugs, ahh well it's part of the challenge.

Phillip Island isn't exactly around the corner from my place, two hours later we rolled into the track warm and sufficiently primed with some ACDC setting the mood. The Sunshine Boy had already had Betty II scrutineered so all I needed to do was saunter around to the pit garage, drink some tea and get leathered up. My morning could not have been easier.

There were three riders in Team Lounge, myself, Sunshine Boy Mark and Brendan. Between us we had a VFR800, VTR1000 and a Buell XB1200 (I think, Buells all look the same to me). The morning banter was light and easy, I could tell this was going to be a good day with the type of people that even bad weather couldn't dampen.

First out was Brendan on the Buell, with light rain falling. Next out was Mark to strangely clear weather and a drying track. I followed in the next session and a return of the rain. Don't ask me how or why but this pattern seemed to follow for the rest of the day - Brendan, rain and high winds, Mark, patches of blue sky and a semi dry to dry track, Me, some ridiculous squalls and huge gusts.....Something is going on here! By now you might have worked out why young Mr Mark was becoming familiar with his new name, the lucky bastard!

Out of eight sessions only about 1 1/2 was in dryish conditions. The two pillion sessions with Mel on the back were the worst. She clearly wasn't praying hard enough as it seemed the weather took a particular dislike to her and dumped even worse amounts of rain on our heads. For her part Mel thought it was "romantic" to ride so slowly around the track so she could enjoy the view of the Bass Strait going troppo. I was just trying to keep the bike upright and pointed in the right direction. Oh well, as long as she had fun.

That pretty much sums up the day. It was wet, windy and occasionally frustrating. It was also accident free and a total ball. I just love track days, even the wet ones. At least I know my wet weather skills are up to scratch. The drive home was warm and relaxing, unlike those other times I rode the bike back. If I can't trailer the bike I'm not going, it's just too much hassle.

And then there was one, one more day of bike porn! Sunday, just to shit me, arrived sunny and warm. I could have sworn but I was in too good a mood. We took our sweet time getting ready but eventually made it down to Jeff's Shed (aka the Exhibition Centre). There were the usual manufacturer displays and some nice apparel and accessories stands though there weren't any new release bikes. The one stand out was the Honda VTR1000 concept bike. It's really something else but it's unlikely to go into production as it is as it looks too impractical. Still there was enough innovative ideas on show to suggest some interesting developments in the future.

Mel spent some time getting the feel for various bikes. In the end she felt the Suzuki SV650 has the best ergonomic for her. Now all we need to do is arrange a test ride once she has a full license. I sat on everything I could, Goldwings, Triumph Rocket IIIs, Ducatis 999s. You name it, my bum got to sample the seat. In my mind I was making "vroom vroom" noises and cruising imaginary back roads on bikes I can only dream of owning. Lucky for me then that I own a dream of a bike in the first place then.

On our way out to meet some friends I stopped by the Buell/Harley test ride stand and took a Buell XB1200S (I think is the model designation) for a quick spin. This is a a bike that feel so small yet packs a big torque punch right off idle. I was worried about it tucking under, the front feels that small. It never did though, it steers quickly but without hassle and pulls hard when asked to. It runs out of puff fairly quickly so you need to play with the box to keep it in the happy range. You do that and it's all smiles and happiness. By the end of the test run I must have been getting the hang of it as I pulled a reasonable mono from the lights without even thinking about it. I wont be trading the VFR but it was fun enough to ride that I'd do it again. It's made it onto my list of "bikes to have when money is no exception".

My overall impression of the expo was that it was slickly run but smaller and lacking in "feel" of the previous ones. I managed to get around this one in about 3 hours. Last year took around 6 hours to give you an idea of the difference.

I've got a number of photos of both days to post. It might take a few days but I'll get something going soon.

Catch you later...

International Talk Like a Pirate Day

Yaarrrrrr! It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day, so it be! Ah haarr! Tell this salty seaman yur salty salior stories or walk the plank, yaarrrr!

Converting the masses

I've decided to travel around the blogosphere, as a virtual apostle, courtesy of the "next blog" button and I have a mission. That mission is to spread the gospel according to Jaked. At this point it's pretty basic and could use some work but I don't see any reason to hold back just because it's totally half arsed. It'll fill out as a sort of organic growth on my brain and may even help the sad, lonely and weird to be less so.

Basically, each time I come across some angst filled individual, struggling with life's little nut crackers, I intend to pass on my way to happiness and fulfilment - get a motorcycle. Whoa! I here you say, but just think about it. A motorcycle is a great mood lifter and once out there it allows for some really deep thought moments. It's very spiritual, believe you me. Jesus would ride, I take that as a given. Not some Harley or some uber sports weapon. I'm sure His choice would be quite sensible but ride He would. It's not as if He'd have to worry about leathers or the like either, so He'd no doubt get really into it. I can see Him on a Honda CT110 Step thru delivering the Message like God's Mailman, or maybe a VFR800, that would work too.

Any way I digress, or I don't, either way that's what I plan to do. It's a sound message and one that is worth spreading. Wish me and Him luck. Catch you later...

Coming up - Track Day and Melbourne Bike Expo

In a mere couple of days the best possible combination of events, somewhat like the planets aligning, is too occur. I'm talking here about an orgy of blokey-maness. I celebration of testosterone and adrenaline, a fever of steel and petrol fueled madness akin to the best sex without the diseases and prengency. I'm talking here folks, of a bike weekend.

This Saturday I and a few mates are heading down to Phillip Island to pit man and machine against ummm....other men and machines. In other words I'm off to another HRCA track day. On hand will be the cream of Honda's sports bike crop, which I hope to lap up and lap around the track, often.

So that's my Saturday taken care of, what about Sunday I hear you say? Well I'm glad you asked, it's the annual Melbourne Motorcycle Expo! Yay! Double Yay with oggie-knobs on! I'm heading to that drool-fest with my good lady Mel and her newly bike mad mate Dimi. Between us we will site on each and every machine present and bother countless happless sales stooges with many and varied questions such as "does her bum look big in that?" and can I "pleeeease have a test ride, I wont pull monos (much)?". Can you guess which question will be asked by whom?

Yes peoples, this truly is better than sex and I am to get some group action going. Wish me luck for Saturday and fun for Sunday.

Catch you later...

Why grown men cry

Or at least why this grown man is shedding a tear....Yes folks, Honda has finally released it's line up for 2006. 2006 was to be a watershed year for VFR owners with the introduction of the new all singing all dancing VFRxxx. What we ended up getting was more of the same with clear indicators.

Actually, in this shot it doesn't look so bad, nice colour and all that. Still, compare it to my wonderful '99 VFR and this freak of nature is the bike equivalent of the elephant man. All they could manage to do was lower the transition point for the VTEC change and fiddle with some cosmetic changes.

Clearly Honda has either not been paying even a little attention to the various outlets for owner's opinions or they just don't care. Not exactly the best way for the world's largest manufacturer of motorcycles to endear it self to the buying public. Other models in the range seemed to have also received the lazy touch this year so I can only wonder as to what Honda is thinking or has planned for the next year. Well, the Triumph Sprint ST1050 is going to murder the VFR in the sales race with it's larger, gutsier engine and good handling but the finish still doesn't compare to what Honda is famous for.

Ah well, when the finances allow I'm shelling out for a PCII, steel brake lines and a better seat. Stuff it, mine's tried and true and doens't look like an Aprillia Futura. Thanks Honda, for sweet FA.

Catch you later...

Birthday and stuff (all)

Back, trying to get over my annoyance with this site and it's ability to lose posts all over the place. I'll have to save on a religious basis and see what happens.

So, I turned 32 Late last month and enjoyed having Mum visit from Tassie and had a great party the following Saturday after the actual day. I suffered like an unloved puppy the next day but my loving girlfriend and a mate had done all the dishes by the time I crawled out of bed so I was able to take it easy on the couch for the most part. Another good friend did all the cooking for the event and I have to say he did a fantastic job of it. I don't think I've had such good curries, and never one with fried banana.

Work has been fairly busy, but that goes hand in hand with taking on the Supervisor's responsibilities and jobs. At least the week flys past now, just wish the weekends didn't as well!

New Orleans has been devastated by a hurricane and from the news footage looks to be pretty much all under water. I'm sure it wont take too long for the global warming doom sayers to jump up onto a soapbox with a tired "i told you so" diatribe.

I've got about two weeks until my track day at Phillip Island and still need to arrange for new boots and fix some tie points to the ute so I can stick the bike in the back. I'm not riding back this time, way too much in one day.

Here's a pic of my Mate Mark's SR500 Single Cafe Racer, it's a tidy piece of kit and one I'm using as a sort of template for another bike I want to modify, namely, Mel's SRV250 V-twin. Don't know when she'll let me at it but the seed has been planted.

Well, this was just a quick post to see if it'll stick this time. If you are reading this then it did, if not, then I'm writing this and totally wasting the effort.